Tuesday morning headlines
Blake planning elopement?
Blake Civil-Fielder is planning to run away with a secret lover – after taking his wife Amy Winehouse's millions. The reports come this morning after Blakeincarcerated told his blonde mistress (who goes by the name Tickles or Pony – seriously ), "I'll leave Amy and we will be rich beyond our wildest dreams. But you have to marry me. Promise me you will and we can be happy." Amy Winehouse’s husband – currently behind bars – is telling friends that he intends to take Amy for a massive seven-figure sum and will demand in excess of £3million. A friend said, "Blake is convinced that Amy owes him big time. He is telling everyone that he's got millions coming to him. She's his meal ticket for life." This new revelation comes just days after Amy was reported to have cheated on him with her manager's aide Alex Haines and is thought to have tipped Blakeincarcerated over the edge with him screaming at fellow inmates, "I'm going to chop his f****** hands off!" Aaaaaanway, we hope you guys had a better Bank Holiday weekend!
Stars make a fortune out of pants
SpongeBob SquarePants has topped the list of stars to make the biggest fortune out of pants – beating the likes of David Beckham and Kylie! The TV series has made a whopping £3.8billion since it started nine years ago making the likes of Sarah Harding's £2.5 million deal with Ultimo look like peanuts. Kylie Minogue's gold hotpants that re-launched her career in hit tune Spinning Around landed her a deal with Agent Provocateur and is worth £40million. But more interestingly is ex-glamour model Jordan, who is worth a total of £30 million. The mum of three bagged £2.8million from Asda to design lingerie for real women, while Liz Hurley is worth just a fraction of her riches – grossing £13million – a proportion of that from her range of bikinis and more recently her underwear designed for high-street store Mango.
Frozen-faced Dannii takes pop at frozen-faced Sharon
Let’s face it, there has never been any love lost between X Factor ladies Dannii Minogue and Sharon Osbourne, but we thought we’d have to wait until at least the next series began before the bitching started up again. Sharon famously took a pop at her rival judge when she appeared on The Graham Norton Show, saying that Dannii had only got the job because of her looks – not her talent as a singer. Well, Dannii has now hit back by saying, “Honestly – I can’t even tell when Sharon’s angry because her face doesn’t move!” Erm, excuse us Ms Minogue, but we don’t remember seeing any lines on your forehead either. It’s a brave lady who takes on Sharon, and we can’t see Mrs Ozzy taking this latest pop lying down. Brace yourselves for a response... *spins round in circles clapping*
Ronaldo speaks of his hooker shame
Brazilian footie ace Ronaldo has spoken for the first time about his encounter with three transvestite hookers, saying that the experience has stained his life forever. The 31-year-old player, who booked the three “ladies” in a club in Rio following a break-up with his then-girlfriend, said he “cried a lot” when he realised they were transvestites and called the incident the “stupidest mistake of my personal life”. Right, so there’s absolutely nothing stupid about hiring three hookers, but if they then turn out to be ladyboys then your life is over? Ronaldo went on to rant, “It’s like a house being knocked down by a hurricane. I have to build it all over again.” Perhaps a tad melodramatic, mate. One of the three transvestites later said that the player treated her to “caresses” and called her “Princess”, but Ronaldo furiously denies having sex with any of them.