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The 9 0'Clock News – Fri 30 Apr

Posted by 30 April 2010 08:59

The 9 0'Clock News – Fri 30 Apr

Cheryl Cole admits she’s “skanky”? Yeah. Right.
Cheryl Cole has admitted in a new interview that sometimes she's a “little bit skanky”, but we’re not sure she actually knows what the word “skanky” means. Surely you have to be dirty and nasty to be skanky, and we’re not sure what Cheryl’s been doing can be classed as either of these things. “I have been known to be a little bit skanky and wear the same pyjamas I woke up in…for, like, six hours,” she exclaimed to Harpers Bazaar. Er, is that it? We were hoping she’d admit picking her nose and eating it at the very least. While we’re on the subject of skanky individuals, Ashley Cole yesterday dropped an appeal he’d launched against a four-month driving ban. Ash was clocked doing 104mph in a 50mph zone. Can you not read road signs, idiot?

 

Kerry lost weight on “divorce diet”

Toss out the Atkins book and cancel that Weight Watchers subscription, because apparently the best way to lose weight is to get divorced. Well, it’s working for Kerry Katona anyway. The newly-svelte star has swapped kebabs and curries for salads and sushi in what she’s calling her “divorce diet” – and she’s determined to keep the weight off this time. “I’m on a divorce diet!” Kerry declared. “It’s a whole new me. I got a bit lost in the last few years but my life’s back on track now.” There’s no denying Kezza is looking tip top. We can only hope and pray and cross every finger and toe that she stays on the straight and narrow from now on.

Vernon Kay gets $1million for US show
He may have had us all waggling the finger at him and his “textcapades” a few months ago, but it hasn’t damaged Vernon Kay’s career as greatest gameshow host in the world ever. The presenter has just landed a whopping $1million contract to host a new US gameshow called The Six. Vern apparently impressed the bosses over the Pond with his broad Bolton accent and they signed him up on the spot. He and wife Tess will now spend the summer over in the States. We knew that ridiculous Wallace & Gromit grin would see him go far. Well done, Vern!

 

Steven Gerrard is a secret Glee fanatic
Someone’s about to lose a whole heap of cool points… It turns out that hotshot footie ace Steven Gerrard has become a secret fan of US show Glee, after his missus Alex Curran begged him to watch it with her. Now friends are claiming the Liverpool player “can’t get enough” of the show, and even records every episode to make sure it doesn’t miss anything. Cute. We love Glee more than Chocolate Buttons, so this has only made Stevie Gerrard go up in our estimations. In other Glee news, upcoming guest star Jennifer Lopez has revealed she was only offered the slot after an online rumour started that she already had one. We’re going to start a rumour that we’ve been offered the next Bond Girl job. What? It could happen.

Average rating: 3 stars (9 votes)

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88 Comments

  • SmileyFace

    09 May 2010 16:40

    If Cheryl Cole is a skank, I am a peasant

    SmileyFace

  • pippa22

    04 May 2010 01:50

    Well said BBobsesser ,I'm bloody sick to death of "Cheryl this and Cheryl that" like she's some sort of hero -anyone would think she was the second coming the way the press go ON and ON about her 24/7 -.....She's just an overrated singer with a not so great at all voice who got lucky on popstars then got lucky agin with X.Factor ,the worst singer from G.A and also the one who gets rewarded for bashing a toilet attendant -I feel sorry for Nadine and hope she kicks her ass with her solo career -Team Nadine x

    pippa22

  • misschocolate86

    03 May 2010 18:06

    I thought I was the only Heat reader who can't stand Cheryl Cole! The novelty will wear off soon-I hope...

    misschocolate86

  • BBobsesser

    02 May 2010 17:00

    HW what the fuck is with the obsession with talentless chavs ie cheryl-"ima victim"-cole, what is the point in wasting valuable time writing about that mind numbingly-boring-talentless hag its starting to really get on my tits, sort it out and write about something remotely interesting@_@ could it kill you?

    BBobsesser

  • Jemzii

    02 May 2010 09:10

    Go glee! Puck rox!

    Jemzii

  • jaclynmc

    30 April 2010 13:54

    Just read that back and seen how it sounds so would like to clarify one thing in case anyone gets worried... I'M NOT A TROLL!!

    jaclynmc

  • jaclynmc

    30 April 2010 13:53

    Yeah I saw the celeb apprentice for the first time last week and she did make me giggle. Tbh I can sing better than she can but I just don't care! I don't think it's her fault so much that the press have been the way they are with her and as far as milking it goes yeah she does but of course she does, she must know how lucky she is...I'd probs do the same

    jaclynmc

  • BlondeBimbo21

    30 April 2010 13:47

    omg Jaclynmc, im kind of the same. Like i dont rate her massively and when there are articles in every mag written about her im just like oh for gods sake im sick of looking at this woman, but when she's ever talking i kind of like her, like when she was on the celeb apprentice i thought she was just hilarious, could defo sit her in the middle of my group of girlfriends and she'd fit right in...

    BlondeBimbo21

  • speedy09

    30 April 2010 13:39

    Cheryl looks like a right loony chav in that pic

    speedy09

  • jaclynmc

    30 April 2010 13:34

    Ladies, I have a terrible, terrible confession to make...I'm a Cheryl lover. I don't understand it, I know she can't sing and doesn't choose her own clothes but if it came down to it, she's my girl crush and would turn for her (despite the fact I'd probs accidently snap her in half if I touched her). Completely see where everyone's coming from slagging her off tho, she is a bit crap! She does come across as quite funny in interviews tho. Do you think there are support groups for this type of problem?

    jaclynmc

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