We’ve got a sneak peek at tonight’s The Only Way Is Essex – expect some sexual frustration, penis chat, and James Bond comparisons!
Gemma Collins: “I've not had sex for a whole year!”
Poor Gemma, in tonight’s episode she reveals that she’s desperate for a bit of loving from new boyfriend Charlie, but after six weeks of dating he still hasn’t put out.
“You know what everyone in Essex is like, they put it about,” Gemma moans to her man.
“I'm not like everyone else,” Charlie retorts. “I'm going to stick to my roots with that, lets just have some fun, you need to be patient with me.”
A frustrated Gemma then reveals that she’s been without sex for a whole year, “I'll be patient with you but its random behaviour, it's bizarre to me – a man wants to touch you, feel you, slap your arse. I've not had sex for a whole year.”
Arg thinks he’s James Bond!
Elsewhere, Lydia Bright, Lucy Mecklenburgh and Bobby gather for a gossip over coffee outside a local Greggs (ooh, high glamour on TOWIE!). They discuss Lucy’s boyf Mario Falcone bidding on Cara at the gala and an annoyed Lucy tells her pals,
“I said to Mario after, why would you bid on Cara? I was so angry. And he was like ‘I would have just got her so she did a days work, clean our cars, look after Bentley’. But you know when you're, like, it's not the point! It's not funny.”
While Lydia also has boy troubles on her mind, telling Lucy and Bobby that James Argent is now strutting about Essex after his weight-loss,
“I think Arg thinks he's James Bond just because he's lost a bit of weight,” she moans.
“You've been blessed with a huge penis haven't you?”
While Arg might feel his ears burning as Lydia talks about him, Ricardo’s (who arrives to help Arg with marathon training) cheeks are burning after Arg brings up the subject of his man bits. Arg can’t help but confront the Essex rumours about Ricardo, “You've been blessed with a huge penis haven't you,” he asks. A bemused Ricardo just jogs on…
And the rest of the goss…
Joey and Tom “chillax” in their pants and they play computer games in their new pad – how very 14-year-old boy of them. While Joey also spends time flirting with Sam at Joey’s ‘Reem night’ at Sugarhut – much to sister Frankie’s annoyance.
At the party the boys break off into two gangs. On one side Joey, Arg, Tom and Digs face off against Ricky, Mario and Lil’ Chris. Each group reckons they’re the biggest hitters with the girls. We’re saying nothing.
The Only Way Is Essex, ITV2 tonight at 10pm