Does X Factor judge Tulisa ever stop partying? Answer: no. She never stops partying. She parties on Hallowe’en. She parties when one of her acts gets voted off the show. She parties so hard her PA gets his foot run over by a car, and then just keep partying.
Yes. In the latest episode of a series we like to call ‘When and How Did Tulisa Do Partying Last Night?’, Tulisa went partying at Mahiki in London after attending the Pride of Britain awards, where she threw shapes with Liam Payne from One Direction before sharing a cab with Max George from The Wanted. It just makes financial sense to split cab fares, is all.
Oh, right, yes: her PA got his foot ran over by a car.
While Tulisa was busy being fiscally responsible in a cab with Max, PA Gareth Varey somehow got his foot a little bit run over by a car. A car driven by Tulisa’s personal driver. Yes, she has a personal driver yet still opted for a cab. Sometimes Tulisa parties so hard she gets confused.
It seems Gareth got his foot turned into a foot-shaped pancake as he was trying to evade the paparazzi, which is confusing because the paparazzi weren’t trying to take pictures of him until he got his foot run over. Then they took loads.
Gareth logged onto the Twitter this morning to tweet a picture of his cast, with the message “I love the British paparazzi. Go you.” We're thinking... sarcasm? Is that sarcastic? We think that might be sarcastic.
Which begs the question: who, out of all of Tulisa’s friends, will fall victim to her relentless partying next? Will Dappy lose a tooth? Will Fazer have to get shin splints? Will Bianca Gascoigne even be invited out at all? Tune in tomorrow to find out.