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Alesha Dixon’s former squeeze MC Harvey gets engaged, and yes we did just call him a squeeze

 

“Does anyone here care about MC Harvey who used to be in So Solid Crew?” we occasionally ask, into the void. The void echoes softly back, “no, not really”. We try again. “Are you sure?” we shout. “He used to be married to Alesha Dixon before he did it crazy-style with Javine?” There is a pause. The void takes a moment to ask. “Which one was Javine, again?” it says. Javine was the one who was on Eurovision once. She has never been a Sugababe.

The Void Knows and Sees All

Anyway, in MC Harvey from out of So Solid Crew news: MC Harvey from So Solid Crew is engaged. Aw. Well, we say “aw”. What we really mean is “uh oh, oh dear”.

The Thing: In the heat offices, at all times, we have a huge list along one wall that tells us, stylistically, how to describe certain celebrities. For instance: Holly Willoughby is always prefaced with ‘lovely’, because she is lovely. Jason Orange is always described as ‘chiselled’, because of his chin. Sometimes we forget these things, and we consult The Wall.

And when we do, under a looming list written in blood-red ink, there are the names ‘MC Harvey’, ‘Darren Day’ and ‘Ashley Cole’: otherwise known as ‘The Love Rats’.
Anyway, best of luck to MC Harvey and his new fiancée Ghazmah. Ghazmah: We hope it goes well. Harvey: We hope you get some TV work soon.

 

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