Kris Humphries looks at the chalky pot where he and Kim Kardashian’s matching his ‘n’ hers toothbrushes used to sit together. “I’m over it,” he says. He microwaves a lasagna for one and eats it from the fine china gifted to the couple on the day of their $10m wedding day. “I’m happy,” he says. He watches basketball on TV, sat in a La–Z–Boy until he falls asleep, alone, in his pants. “I’m better off this way,” he thinks. Anyway Kris Humphries says he is totally happy following his divorce from Kim Kardashian and isn’t even bothered about it or anything.
Speaking to Us Magazine, the Brooklyn Nets power forward (basketball thrower) said he was happy being single, and that he had learned a lot after his divorce was finalised earlier this month. Every cloud, yeah?
“I don’t have any [girlfriends] right now,” he said, highlight on the s. “I’m happy. I’ve got a big smile on my face.”
And Kris shared some wise, sage-like advice on the nature of marriage, so listen up, people: Kris Humphries is about to drop a knowledge bomb on y’all.
“I think you learn something all the time. I’m just focused on me and having a good time. You can’t force a love life – I’m just focused on training and basketball.” So if you’re recently heartbroken, why not microwave a lasagna and throw a ball through a hoop, Humphries-style.