Kate Middleton (yes, we KNOW her official name is the Duchess of Cambridge - but it just doesn't roll off the tongue, does it?) has been receiving royal baby advice left, right and centre.
But now, just days before the date she is due to give birth to her and Prince William's first child together, as well as the future King or Queen of England, KMiddy has FINALLY received the advice she has long been craving.
From Snooki. Yes, THAT Snooki.
The Jersey Shore reality star, in an open letter to YourTango.com, has dished out her own unique brand of mothering adviuce to Kate Middleton. And it makes for a VERY entertaining read:
"Dear Duchess of Cambridge aka Kate Middleton," Snooki begins formally. "Waiting for your little Prince or Princess to arrive, I am sure you are prepared for your life to totally change—even more than it already has."
"In the beginning, right when you take your royal golden nugget home to the castle is the most exciting experience of your life. I couldn’t wait to wake up in the middle of the night to take care of my little prince Lorenzo."
Royal golden nugget? That's... damn. We wish we'd thought of that.
Snooki goes on to get a bit more realistic about what Kate can expect from motherhood, saying: "But that lasts for about a few days. Then it’s like, 'I love you but OMG stop crying! I’m exhausted.'"
"The lack of sleep you will get used to—just do your makeup, put a tiara on, and you’ll look beautiful as usual."
"Be sure to sing to your baby a lot, too! When I sing to my booger, he calms down and stares at me like he’s in love, which makes me feel amazing—or he’s just trying to tell me to shut the hell up because I can’t sing."
"Anyway, music calms them down. I’m pretty sure you can have anyone you want over to sing to your little one … maybe a lullaby from Elton John?"
Snooki, otherwise known as Nicole Polizzi, finished on a positive note: "I have no doubt that you will be an amazing mom, but talking to other moms helps, especially being a new mommy. I think we can now add Goddess to your list of titles."
So yeah. That's pretty much motherhood summed up in one easy-to-read letter - we wonder if Kate will print a copy off to keep close at hand. You know, for those particularly tricky royal baby moments?