Oh Jodie, Jodie, Jodie. It’s been a while since Jodie Marsh has worn a ridiculous outfit for a big ol’ knees-up, but, now that she’s got new 32GG boobs to show off, she’s back… and we’re quite scared. Jodie went to the opening of an envelope bar in London last night, and appeared to have smuggled the members of Right Said Fred (sorry, we formed our sense of humour in 1991) into her top. Actually, does one even call that thing a top? Jodie had her boob job a couple of months ago, because her real boobs – you know, the ones she said she’d never have surgery on – were starting to head south. “Gravity had taken its toll and as any woman with big real boobs knows; when they lose volume it's not attractive or confidence-building,” she says. “There are so many images of women with amazing fake boobs, I didn't really feel like mine were good enough. I think society has forgotten what real boobs look like, and women like me end up thinking our boobs aren't nice because they disappear into our armpits when we lie down.” Oh gawd, we have a feeling we’re going to be seeing quite a lot of Jodie’s shiny new friends over the next few months… we’re not even sure why she bothers wearing clothes at all.
Words fail us...Words fail us...