We think this might just be the most explosive episode of The Only Way Is Essex yet. Here’s what went down.
Bobby and Charlie have a lads’ day out…at the salon
Charlie King and new best buddy Bobby Cole-Norris decide they’ve been pushing themselves too hard recently – what with all the partying and that – so they treat themselves to a relaxing day at the beauty salon.
While Bobby enjoys a head massage and Charlie gets his cuticles in check, the boys discuss Charlie’s recent night out where he hit the dance floor with as much style and credibility as our great uncle Keith at a wedding reception.
Charlie’s got a feeling girlfriend Gemma Collins might have been a touch embarrassed by his killer moves and he’s upset. Maybe if he was using up some of his energy in the bedroom instead of at the Sugar Hut, there might not be a problem…
It’s nearly D-day for Billi Mucklow, Cara Kilbey and James ‘Arg’ Argent. They're getting prepared for the marathon, which of course means the girls need to vajazzle their running vests.
Arg has more pressing things on his mind – what’s going to happen to his nipples on the big day? He tells the girls they’ve already started bleeding during training and he’s worried there’s going to be more lasting damage when he does the marathon.
Little Chris opens up…and Ricky and Mario take the mick
Little Chris opens up about his disastrous date proposal to Frankie Essex – much to Ricky Rayment and Mario Falcone’s enjoyment. Poor old Chris.
The boys also take bets on how soon Arg will give up during the marathon. Arg sure shows them…
Joey’s new band – The Boys
Joey Essex and his buddies Tom Kilbey and Tom Pearce, wind poor Diags up about how much his house smells like cats, which leads to Joey and new band The Boys crafting a song that’s up there with the likes of Beethoven, and One Direction. Stinks Like Cats will be Number 1 before you know it.
Also, Tom Pearce asks Lauren Goodger out on a sort of date, and she seems pretty keen.
Is Sam texting Ricky?
Sam Faiers and sister Billie talk about Ricky’s mysterious texter. Sam says she’s going to have a word with Ricky tonight at Gemma's kaftan party (yes, you read that right – a kaftan party) because the whole situation’s going to cause friction amongst the group and it’s not fair on Ricky’s new squeeze, Jess Wright.
So the secret sexter must be Sam, right? Think again.
Gemma apologises to Charlie for calling him an embarrassment. She admits she was out of order and they agree to draw a line under it. So all’s good for Gemma and Charlie… for now.
Gemma’s kaftan party gets under way and her new plus-size clothing range goes on show in a holiday-inspired catwalk show.
The secret sexter is revealed
Sam speaks to Ricky and tells him he needs to talk to the secret sexter and put a stop to it before someone gets hurt. And that’s exactly what he does.
“You know I've been seeing Jess, she's one of your friends, everyone's been talking about it,” Ricky tells Gemma. That’s right GEMMA!!
“So I just want it to end now, OK? So that's it.”
Oh Gemma, what have you done?