Last Thursday morning, an unexpected shadow slowly crept over my desk. I nervously looked up to see the famous Boyd Hilton looming before me, a boyish excitement dancing in his eyes - was a new Apple product about to be launched??
No, but would I fancy helping him out on the Million Pound Drop later that day? He told me we wouldn't be playing for real money, swiftly dashing any hopes I had of returning that day a million pounds richer but that our experience would feature in Heat magazine and we'd get a little video out of it which
might go some way towards appeasing my paralysing desperation for a piecemeal scrap of notoriety would be nice!
I said yes and soon we were in a taxi being whisked though London to the studio.
We were met by the lovely Davina McCall who entertained us with discussions of the nutritional benefits of avocado and her newfound love of Vancouver. Suddenly, the lights behind us burst into life, Davina wished us luck and then vanished into the dry smoke…
A few seconds later we heard our names being called with glorious enthusiasm, a huge cheer erupting from the audience and we began our ascent up the stairs towards our one million fictional pounds.
After carrying Boyd though most of the rounds, we suddenly found ourselves on the last question! Boyd was trembling like a leaf caught in a bike spoke, but my solid posture and sturdy jawline managed to prevent him from breaking down completely.
With my tenacity and intellect we naturally guessed the last question correctly and went on to win a fictional £300,000! Please take note that this was the most that has EVER been won on the show, which basically means we are the best Million Pound Drop players in the entire world***
Anyway, if you want to get a flavour of the tension, then take a second to check out this video of the experience.
*** irrespective of the fact that our final question may have been dumbed down to ensure that we returned to Heat as happy and glorious winners