Cheryl Cole has opened up about being fired from the* X Factor USA* after just one show by saying she sent Simon Cowell a sweary text after she found out the news.
Speaking to Elle UK in a very revealing interview, Cheryl explained that Simon hadn't even had the decently of dropping her from the judges panel face to face.
"[It said,] 'F_ck you. F_ck Fox. F_ck the orange and purple outfit. F_ck big hair![]. F_ck the UK X Factor. F_ck you all. I hate you,'" she laughed.
But Cheryl says now that at the time she was going through some mental health issues![] that made her desensitised to everything going on around her.
"I can talk about this because I'm OK about it now. But I went through hell and it literally drove me mad," she told the magazine.
"I became so desensitised, you could say terrible things to me and I wouldn't even think about it. I'd read awful stuff about myself and not blink. I shut down because I didn't know what else to do."
Cheryl now reckons Simon took the right decision to fire her so soon into the start of her new job – he just didn't go about it in the right way.
"I wasn't well in the head when that was going on, so it wasn't going to work. But he wasn't right not to tell me to my face."
She also claims that her friendship with two of her Girls Aloud bandmates –Nicola Roberts and Kimberley Walsh – saved her life, especially Kimberley, who "when I do finally grow![] up, is the woman I want to be".
The Crazy Stupid Love singer said she can't wait to be an honorary aunt when Kimberley gives birth in the next few weeks.
"I'll be going to look after her baby. I'm getting a Moses basket for my house because the baby is going to be part of my life, too. I honestly can't wait," she added.
But is Cheryl feeling at all jealous that the life she could have had – a happy marriage to Ashley Cole, perhaps her own family – has been taken away from her?
"I've learned there is no such thing as a plan. You can't make them. I'm just enjoying finding out who I am. That's good enough right now."